New Normal


The other day after work I was going back home  on a train. A train ride for me  is normally time to retrospect  about work, pending work, why and where I went wrong. I would  grimace over my lack of patience, my  lack of tactfulness and my burst of anger. Despite the fact that I was so  engrossed in the deliberation, periodic giggle of  a bevy of teens caught my attention. There were giggles and then a burst of laughter. Oh! What a life, huh? That’s what I thought with a smile on my face. Leaving behind my thought process, I started to catch their cheerful conversation. They were babbling about something bizarre and confusing: Default Meals. I did not even know what is that- is it some new term of the wired world? Or are they really referring to meals? I was taken aback by what I overheard.

Basically, it was like this- most of the times, they do not eat unless and until their body shows signs of low energy and dizziness among other things. Moreover, when stomach is growling loud enough to be heard by another person, they go and grab a quick meal.Default Meal is what they chose to name it. I was shocked to death.

I was like, oh my god! In the craze of size zero these furtive teens cannot even call their meal a meal? Like many other things it has  become the default too. Like it or not, we are going to see more teenagers- boys and girls who will follow the suit. However, the issueneeds to be addressed in a deeper and more holistic manner beyond just eating default meals. I am/was dead right- What a life?  Only with a scowl this time.

Many weeks have passed by but, I am still thinking seriously were they kidding? or……


New Normal

Honey, I need ‘worry breaks’

After the usual long, exhausting day, there is nothing quite like reading  a  great book by none other than Robin Sharma. As I was reading, I came across the term ‘worry breaks.’  

 The idea of worry breaks sounds like the perfect escape from the constant worry, but its application and practicality left me a little dubious. Does it really work? Can I really do it? But then I thought that we do worry all day long.  We worry about our relationships, we worry about our  kids and their studies, their jobs, our dreams and our aspirations. The list is endless.  We are trapped in the vicious circle of fretting, worrying and  feeling agonized.  In this fast paced worrysome world, we have lost the time  to sit back, relax, laugh and enjoy.

This essentially means limiting our ‘worry time’ to perhaps 30 minutes an evening or an hour a day. In this scheduled worry session, we may feel exasperated just thinking about the senseless delays or be overcome with annoyance, but it’s important to remember that once this period ends, we must stop. We must stop worrying, train ourselves to leave our worries in the past and engage ourselves in something productive – maybe cook a fantastic meal or just have a meaningful conversation with the ones we love. If we feel worried or anxious during any other times of our day, we must jot it down and fret over it during our next worry break!

This may sound a little absurd at first, but we must admit, we’ve lost ourselves. We’ve lost ourselves in this spiral of constant distress and fretting over things that don’t matter. It’s about time we pause and reflect. We need to take worry breaks. We  need to unplug from the  chaos and reconnect.

 Worry or ‘worry breaks’- The choice is yours.


Warmth of Love

When I started writing about love. I was wondering as to what exactly is love? In this case, the conundrum is how to put this into words.  Then I got this realization,  the love is something, I expect from my family and friends all the time. Similarly my family and friends expect it from me too. But the question remains the same- what is that? It is neither a thing with a price tag nor a thing to wear. Neither a place where I can go and soak myself nor a thing to eat and taste. Then what is it? I thought of googling about it like a whole lot of other things. It was a real zinger. But indeed an echt.  I was surprised to note, “What is love” was the most searched phrase on the Google in 2012.

Are you also not startled? A simple word which we feel and bestow every single moment is so difficult to put into the words.

The answer still remains elusive partly because it is not always alike. It manifests in different ways like love for parents, children, friends, pets,  country and god to name a few.

Slide2Indeed,  love is an emotion, sentiment, concern or feeling. It varies in intensity depending on the type of relationship and circumstances. Nevertheless, all love is a kind of passionate commitment that we develop and nurture  over a period of time. It is undoubtedly an experience and has contributed to promote, sustain and maintain long term relationships and to foster a feeling of safety and security. It definitely is  a means of survival. It is the lifeline of social order.

Love is the greatest blessing of life. Showing  love and  affection is an absolutely necessary for positive physical, mental, emotional, and social development of a child. Young children discover, develop, nurture, and progress rapidly when they receive love and affection along with attention, encouragement, mental stimulation, nutritious meals and good health care. It is the most important thing you can provide to your child beyond meeting his or her basic human needs.

The scientific studies have reaffirmed as to how important it is to show love and shower the people you love with the love. A study from UCLA suggested that a loving parental figure may alter neural circuits in the children that could influence the health throughout a lifespan. On the flip side, the negative impact of the childhood abuse or lack of the parental affection may take a mental and physical toll that can also last a lifetime. The childhood neglect increases the risk for the adult morbidity and mortality.


A research has proposed a link between a larger hippocampus and a better memory. The brain images have revealed that a mother’s love physically affects the volume of her child’s hippocampus. In the study, the children of nurturing mothers had hippocampus volumes 10 percent larger than the children whose mothers were not as nurturing.

In our rapidly transforming globalised multitasking society where due to the explosion of the  social media face to face human interaction is declining, one generation full of deeply loving parents would change the brain of the next generation and with that, the world- this approach will reflect the zeitgeist of a nimble society.

last of love

So darling!! wear your heart on your sleeve, show your love – for what matters, for whom matters and when it matters. It is rightly said: “Love begets love.”